SGI President Ikeda’s essay series
Imagine a conversation between a mother and her three-year-old son, who is trying to cut an apple with a sharp knife.
“Put that knife down!” says the mother. “You’re going to cut your finger.”
“No, I won’t cut myself!” retorts the child.
“Yes, you will!” responds the mother angrily.
This only makes the child more determined.
“No, I’m not!”
“You are, too!” shouts the mother, even angrier.
“Give me the knife!”
“NO!!” shouts the child.
Then the mother suddenly remembers something she had studied in psychology—that every accusatory “you” message can be turned into a non-blaming “I” message. She pauses a moment, and then, in a tone of voice free from anger, says:“When I see you holding that sharp knife, I feel scared. I worry that you might (more…)
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